The Illusion of Safety: Parental Supervision and Teen Drinking
We’ve all heard it before: “I’d rather the kids drink here—at least I know they’re safe. At least I know they aren’t driving.” It seems logical, even responsible–but what if the opposite is true? Research shows that teens allowed to drink at home are actually more likely to binge drink—and eventually, drive under the influence.
Here’s why: When kids are permitted to drink at home, they receive the message that alcohol is acceptable, all while being shielded from its natural consequences. This reinforces the false belief that substance use is safe. Over time, this conditioning can lead to riskier behaviors, especially since teens who drink at home are more likely to drink elsewhere. What starts as an effort to keep them safe can, ironically, increase their risk of harm.
A recent study from the University of Buffalo’s Department of Psychology found that when parents allow alcohol use at home, it often accelerates the onset of drinking and increases overall consumption—directly contradicting the idea that supervised drinking encourages responsibility. In fact, teens permitted to drink by their parents are more likely to quickly progress from their first drink to binge drinking (five or more drinks in one sitting) and heavy drinking (three or more binge drinking episodes a year). It’s not just access to alcohol that leads to these behaviors; it’s the perception of parental approval that makes teens more likely to drink recklessly.
In addition to increasing the rate of risky drinking behaviors, research shows that the earlier teens have access to substances, the more likely they are to develop substance use disorders (the term that is now used instead of addiction). Teens who start drinking at age 13 have a 47% chance of developing a substance use disorder. However, each year they delay drinking, those odds decrease significantly. By the time they reach 21, the chance of developing a substance use disorder drops to under 10%.
Despite this evidence, many parents still cling to misconceptions about teen drinking. We often rely on anecdotal evidence or beliefs that align with our biases, but the research is clear: granting teens permission to drink only leads to greater harm.
The good news? We have more information than ever before to make better, informed decisions. That’s why we’ve created resources to help parents navigate these challenges, equipping them with the facts to guide their kids toward healthier choices.
Through our Scripts section, we are dispelling common myths and offering parents talking points to share with their communities.
Some of the myths we’re busting:
“I’d rather have them drink at the house where it's safe. It’s not like they’re driving.”
“A little alcohol won’t hurt them, and it’s better to learn how to handle it early.”
“I drank when I was their age, and I turned out fine.”
“I don’t want to be the ‘strict parent’—they’ll just rebel.”
“Other parents let their kids drink, so why should we be different?”
“I’d rather they smoke weed than drink alcohol.”
“Kids are going to drink no matter what we do.”
Spoiler alert: none of these things are true.
In Marin, where substance use rates are high, many parents wonder how they can make a difference. While the factors influencing teen substance use are complex, there are simple, effective actions we can take:
Share your values with your kids. Let them know you care deeply about their safety and well-being.
Help them understand that waiting longer to use substances supports brain development and promotes healthier choices.
Gather the facts and stay informed about the risks and consequences of substance use.
Be honest with your kids, fostering an open and trusting environment for honest conversation.
Never allow underage substance use in your home. Set clear boundaries and lead by example.
Learn together as a family, strengthening your ability to navigate these challenges with understanding and support.
Remember, being clear about your expectations isn’t about giving your kids something to rebel against—it’s about giving them something to hold onto as they confidently find their way.
In addition to being risky, allowing kids to drink at home is also illegal. The Social Host Ordinance in Marin County holds parents and adults accountable for underage drinking that occurs on their property, even if they don't provide the alcohol themselves. By hosting underage drinking, you can face fines, legal consequences, and damage to your reputation. It's crucial for parents to be aware of this law and understand that permitting alcohol use at home can lead to serious legal and safety risks. For more information, visit the Social Host Ordinance page.